Use the Schwartz Light-Saber, Luke!!!

Use the force at

This thing has been popping up everywhere and I finally whacked enough 13-year-olds away that I could get my hands on the new “Jedi Negotiation tool,” the Star Wars FX light saber. This is not a cheap toy from the grocery toy aisle–this is a metal-and-polycarbonate (the same stuff iBooks are sheathed in) replica of the honorable Jedi dueling weapon. It is officially licensed (although what isn’t now?), heavy and fun to whack 13-year-olds with (but I would never condone that, of course). For those of you looking to make internet videos of yourself whirling light sabers around, this is the thing–it lights up (in blue or red), with all the requisite “zzzzaash!” noises, and the sound effects are straight out of the movies. Now you, too can wail away on the Dark Side to your heart’s content in the comfort and privacy of someone’s Star Wars-themed basement. On a darker note (Ha!) these things can be used to hurt someone (yes, they’re fairly solid) and should be treated the same way a staff or broomstick would be used (wildly and with abandon). At $120, these are not priced towards the average 13-year-old, but at our local Borders the other day, a mother and her 6-year-old were playing with one, and the little boy didn’t get to play with it much. Running for several hours on a set of batteries, dueling at twilight is just seriously cool to watch, and the motion-sensitive sound effects whisper the allure of the dark side: Come dress up like a fictional character and whack people with light-up swords….

If you need me, I’ll be in the basement. Challenge me if you dare, young Padawan… ZZzzaash! [Britt Godwin]